V 2 N. 7 I Couldn't Let This One Go Unmentioned

 From The Guardian  February 21, 2026   Signs You're Heading for Divorce  by Laura Potter


For hardcore runners male and/or female.

This article lists a number of reasons couples may be heading or once were headed for divorce.  I was particularly intrigued by the fifth reason.  I leave it to you to read that one and assess your life.  Care to confess or leave a response?  Send me a reply or clik on the Comments section below.

George



1. You stop arguing


2. You don’t say ‘thank you’ any more

 

 Photograph: ClassicStock/Alamy

3. You know exactly what the other person is thinking


4. One of you goes to bed early every night


5. You take up ultramarathons

Again, there are plenty of caveats, but getting overly absorbed in hobbies leaves little space for couples to connect meaningfully. “Hobbies are great and it’s important that couples have activities they do together as well as time apart, but when one member of a couple takes up an activity that is extremely time-consuming, it can be a sign that the relationship has been demoted in favour of the activity,” warns Metz. Bose agrees, saying: “Getting overly absorbed in hobbies can be a way to distract from connecting directly with one another.”

So how do you know whether their devotion to running, cycling or writing a novel is a red flag, not just an innocent desire to get fit or take on a challenge? “If your partner is rigid about how much time is spent on the activity, or the activity begins to infringe upon the couple spending time together or going to important events – ‘I’m sorry I can’t attend our anniversary weekend/our son’s graduation because I need to train for my bike race’. There is a difference between a one-time event (training for one marathon) versus a new all-encompassing hobby that goes on indefinitely,” says Metz. A hobby becomes unfair to a spouse “when it is negatively impacting one partner in an ongoing way; creating inequality or leaving no time for the couple to connect, or when there is no compromise”.

To shore up your marriage, Metz advises looking for compromise: “Instead of ultramarathons, can the runner just do marathons? If the hobby takes many hours a week and the bulk of the parenting or home care falls to the other spouse, can the ultramarathon runner pitch in more at other times during the week?”

6. You never ask for help


I must confess that I am still married to the first woman I married in 1970.  Our marriage was not based on anything but love and mutual respect.  She didn't see the point of my running.  Although she did try it for a year and thought it helped her smoke better.  We both gave each other a lot of space to do our respective things, and it seems to have worked.  George Brose


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